When Symptoms Get Louder: The Body’s Need to Be Seen, Heard, and Safe

Many people come to therapy or nutritional support feeling confused and frustrated by their symptoms. They’ve tried doing “all the right things”. They may have followed protocols, changed their diet, taken supplements, rested more, or pushed themselves less. And yet, their symptoms persist or even worsen. Often, when we slow things down and widen the lens, a deeper pattern begins to emerge.

Not just in the body, but in the relational field around them.

Feeling Unseen and Unbelieved

A common thread I hear is this:“My family doesn’t really get it.”“My friends think I’m exaggerating.”“I feel like I have to justify how unwell I feel.” When someone is surrounded by people who minimise their experience, dismiss their symptoms, or encourage them to “just get on with it”, something important is missing: validation. From a psychotherapy perspective, not being seen or believed is not neutral. It is experienced by the nervous system as a lack of safety. Humans are wired for connection. We regulate through relationships. When our inner experience is consistently misunderstood or invalidated, the body stays on high alert. There is no felt sense of safety in being as we are. And when safety is missing, the nervous system adapts.

The Body as Communicator

Symptoms are not random or meaningless. From both a psychotherapeutic and functional medicine perspective, symptoms are communication. When words haven’t worked. When explaining hasn’t helped. When asking for support has led to dismissal, then the body may step in and speak louder. This is not conscious. It is not manipulation. It is not “wanting attention” in the way people often fear being accused of. It is the nervous system attempting to be recognised.

In psychotherapy, this can be understood as the body holding what could not be held relationally. If emotional needs, distress, fear, anger, or grief have no safe place to land, they often find expression through the body. Psychosomatic symptoms are not imagined. They are embodied experiences rooted in real physiological processes, shaped by relational context.

Safety and the Nervous System

Safety is not just the absence of danger. It is the presence of attunement. Feeling safe means:Someone believes you. Someone takes you seriously. Someone is curious rather than dismissive. Someone stays with you rather than rushing to fix or minimise. Without this, the nervous system remains in a state of protection. Chronic stress responses become the norm. Over time, this affects digestion, immunity, hormones, inflammation, sleep, and energy. From a functional medicine lens, this shows up clearly. We see dysregulated cortisol. Impaired gut function. Increased inflammation. Nutrient depletion. Poor detoxification capacity. The body cannot heal in an environment where it does not feel safe, whether that environment is external or internal.

Nutrition and Therapy Are Not Separate

This is where nutritional therapy and psychotherapy meet. You can give the body all the right nutrients, but if the nervous system is constantly braced, those nutrients may not be absorbed or utilised effectively. Equally, you can explore emotional patterns and relational wounds in therapy, but if the body is depleted, inflamed, or overwhelmed, it becomes much harder to feel resourced enough to do that work. Healing happens when both are addressed together. Nutrition can support safety by stabilising blood sugar, reducing inflammatory load, supporting gut-brain communication, and replenishing nutrients that are essential for nervous system regulation. Psychotherapy supports safety by offering a relational space where the person feels seen, heard, and met without judgement. Where symptoms are explored with curiosity rather than dismissed or pathologised.

Symptoms as Protection, Not Failure

When symptoms worsen in the context of not being understood, this is not a failure of the body. It is an intelligent response. The body is saying: I need support.I need to be taken seriously. I cannot do this alone. Rather than asking “What’s wrong with me?”, a more compassionate question is: What has my body had to carry without enough support? Healing often begins when someone finally feels believed. When the body no longer has to shout to be heard. When safety is established, not forced. When the whole person is considered, not just isolated symptoms.

A Different Way of Approaching Healing

True healing is not about overriding the body or pushing through symptoms.

It is about creating the conditions where the body no longer needs to protect in the same way. That means:Listening rather than dismissing. Supporting rather than minimising. Working with the nervous system, not against it. Addressing biology and biography together.

When safety is restored, symptoms often soften. Not because they were “all in your head”, but because they no longer need to carry the whole message on their own.

If you are struggling and feel unseen or misunderstood, your experience matters. Your symptoms make sense in context. And you deserve support that honours the full picture of who you are.